9 Things You Will Experience If You Are Marrying a Bengali

If you are marrying a Bengali, rest assured that you are signing up for a roller coaster ride of drama, entertainment and fun! Modern in outlook, but traditional at heart, Bengalis are passionate, artistic and a really entertaining community of people. The only catch is that you will never be their first love, as that spot will always be reserved for some good old Biryani!

So, if you are set to take the journey of your life with a Bengali, here are a few things you will definitely experience:

Marrying a Bengali
Marrying a Bengali

#1. No festival in the world compares to ‘Durga Pujo’

It is a fact universally known that the number of days left in Durga Puja is inversely proportional to the increase in the state of excitement of a true blue Bengali. Months of shopping and planning is still too less when it comes to the five days of Durga puja. The sound of the ‘dhaaks’, colour coordinated pujo outfits, staying out pandal hopping till 4 am, the sumptuous bhog and all the awesome street food is literally what every Bengali lives for. 

Pujo

#2. Get used to endless debates and discussions

Giving ‘Adda’ is the national pastime of Bengalis. No topic is beyond the scope of discussion and debate for a Bengali. They have opinions about everything in the universe. If you happen to disagree with those opinions, you cannot simply walk away without debating with them over some ‘Cha.’

Debate

#3. Food is BAE: before anyone, or anything else

Bengalis live to eat. Every occasion warrants good food, every outing warrants good food, every moment warrants good food. If your partner is not talking to you while eating, that is because they are already dreaming about their next meal while they are still eating this one.  If you are not a foodie, you will be forcefully pushed over to the other side pretty soon, so brace yourselves.

Eating Pani Puri

#4. They read stuff and know things

Having grown up on a steady diet of all kinds of books, magazines and periodicals, Bengalis are well-read and full of mundane information. No, you cannot simply read, watch or make an observation about something without being told at least one fun fact about it which you weren’t aware of. You will have to just learn to deal with it!

I know things

#5. Everything in your life will become much more dramatic

Drama is the middle name of every Bengali. They are intense, passionate and supremely dramatic people. So if you are marrying a Bengali, get ready to experience life in cinemascope. Every movie, every cricket match, every political news will garner reactions of theatrical proportions. Popular culture references will be everywhere, from Tintin to Feluda to Bob Marley and Che Guevera. For the Bengali mind, nothing is ordinary, after all!

The Drama

#6. Get used to their bizarre pet names or ‘Daak Naam’

For every beautiful, unique and difficult to pronounce Bengali name, there is an embarrassing pet name or ‘daak naam’ which pretty much every Bengali spends their life hiding from their professional circle. Don’t be confused if your articulate, intelligent and super attractive partner is called ‘dodo’ or ‘budhiya’ at home. It is merely a sign of a normal, happy Bengali childhood. 

Nicknames

#7. You are marrying not a person but an Event

Marrying a Bengali would guarantee a one person cultural event for you every day of your life. The average Bengali knows how to cook, how to sing, how to dance, how to paint and how to play at least three musical instruments. They are also often masters of strange unheard-of talents like reciting songs backwards, in tune prolonged whistling or rhythmic eyebrow movements, so, well!

Multitasking

#8. You will be a part of lots of interesting rituals

Bengali rituals are very colourful and entertaining. If you are married to one, not only will your wedding be super unique and fun, but you’ll also have a ton of pre-wedding and post-wedding rituals. From the ‘Ai budo bhaat’ which is the royal feast that the to be bride/groom enjoys on behalf of the family to the super fun ‘Gaaye holud’ where not just the bride and the groom but the entire family plays Holi with the traditional haldi, you will never be not entertained!

So much fun

#9. There will never be an occasion without gifts

Bengalis are fervent believers of ‘gift and get gifts’. A belief that is reflected in the tradition of the ‘Biyer Tatwa’ or wedding gifts. Gifts are considered to be marks of respect, acceptance and aesthetic sense in Bengali culture. So, if you are marrying into a Bengali family, expect a slew of gifts!

Gift

For some great gift ideas for a Bengali couple, see here.

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Comments

  1. Great write-up . I feel almost all are true!

  2. Love the post. Im married to a Bong girl. All the points are true!
    Specially the one about singing songs in reverse 😀
    The presents one is insightful too! People from outside the culture usually dont understand that and leads to problems

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